momtuition

Double Dead Serious

Posted on: February 4, 2011

So I’m finally able (I think) to talk about this unfortunate event.

I was involved in a hit-and-run that caused a death! There… I said it!

I ran over the “breadwinner of a family” at approximately 8:25AM on Jan. 24th. The same day my granddad was being buried. Talk about bad karma.

So we’re on our way to school. My mom is with me – I was taking her somewhere – I don’t even remember – I tell you, much of the morning after the accident happened was a blur.

So we’re driving through Cedar Valley and out of nowhere comes a mongoose running across the street. I wasn’t exactly going 20 miles per hour. I tried to stop… Oh, I did, I did, I did – But it was just so fast. So there I was… Coming to a screeching halt and screaming at the top of my lungs.
SIDE NOTE: Ok, why does that last sentence sound totally weird now I’m writing it down for you?

Anyway… I’m screaming at the top of my lungs and Kuba is in the back cackling. I’m trying to remember what mom was doing but I can’t. She was probably thinking… OMG, I hope no one recognizes me through this tint.

The next thing I heard was the sound like “flop, flop, flop” – Almost like the sound you hear when you drive with a flat tire. Then I knew it… I had just killed the head of a family. Don’t ask me how I know it was the head of the family. I just did. It was too early in the morning – He must have been going out looking for something to eat. SIDE NOTE: It just occurred to me that he could have been just returning home after spending the night out – And if that’s the case I would still be upset that I killed him but a little maiming wouldn’t have hurt.

Back to the saga… I couldn’t bear to come out of the car to go look. I just couldn’t. We kept on driving. SIDE NOTE: Notice I was the one driving the car until I ran over the breadwinner of a Mongoose family. Now it’s “we” kept on driving. Is that a psychological thing? It serves them right… They could have been more supportive. Now I’m telling my story. So…

We kept on driving and I kept on looking back in my rear view mirror and repeating:

Me: OMG, OMG, OMG!

Kuba (shouting): What happen? (looking back)

Me: OMG, I can’t believe I did that

Kuba: Oh no! What happen?

Mom: Look at where you’re going please

Me: I feel so bad. Why did this have to happen this morning of all days?

Mom: Well, if mongoose have 9 lives you just too the tenth one. It won’t even come back in spirit.

Me: I feel so bad. I’ve never ran over anything like that before. I mean, stuff that’s already dead on the road… Yeah. And even those I try to avoid. I’m sure he has a family waiting for him to come back home. SIDE NOTE: I should have known to let that be the first and the last time I repeat that (my last comment) to anyone.

Mom: Starts laughing

Me: I can’t believe your laughing

Mom: I can’t believe you’re serious

So… I get Kuba to school. Take mom by the dressmaker. Head to the office.

Talking to a friend online I decided to tell her about my experience. Who told me to do that. The “lol’s” were coming fast and furious. Then she said…

Friend: You’re supposed to be mourning your grandfather. What mongoose you telling me about girl?

Me: I am but I feel so terrible about this. My grandfather was surrounded by family when he died. I’m sure his (mongoose) family is waiting for him to come back home

Friend: Girl what are you telling me. Are you serious?

Fast forward to a few hours later. Talking to a friend who does counseling. And no, I did not call for that purpose. But you would think that of all people she would understand. And it goes…

Phone conversation
Me: My day is just going downhill

Friend (Counselor): Oh my, what happened

Me: Today is my granddad’s funeral and of all the things that could go wrong I ran over a mongoose and killed it. I feel so bad

Friend: My condolences… Sorry to hear about your granddad. Don’t feel too bad about the mongoose

Me: What do you mean?

Now… My friend is… How do I put this into words. Remember when I told you guys about Kuba farting and then announcing, “That’s a fart” – And the shock that registers on some people’s faces? Well this was a phone conversation so I couldn’t see her face but I could just tell. But alas, the shock did not last long

Me: I’m sure his family is waiting for him to come back. I feel so bad

Friend – Laughing so uncontrollably I might add, she couldn’t even speak.

Me: You’re laughing? I can’t believe you’re laughing

Friend: I’m not laughing (Her voice sounds like a whisper, she’s trying so hard not to laugh)

Me: You’re not laughing? Anyway, go ahead, laugh

Friend: Are you serious? SIDE NOTE: There it goes again… Another person asking me if I’m serious. What is it going to take to get someone to take my grief seriously

Me: Yes I’m serious

Friend (still trying to muffle her laughing): I’m so sorry Salma – Sorry you’re feeling that way – But let me call you back. I have to go do something. SIDE NOTE: That something was to laugh – She couldn’t control herself

I still have flashbacks of that day – And yes… I’m serious

BTW, if you’re a parent of a special needs child and you’re wondering if I took Kuba to the funeral with me. No, I didn’t. I’m a bit anxious about it on two fronts – What would be his reaction and what would the reaction of others be. Sometimes Kuba laughs as a way of escaping. Escaping an uncomfortable situation, if he’s being over-stimulated etc.

You know, as a society and as individuals within it, we assign both global and personally subjective labels to what constitutes appropriate and inappropriate behaviors within specific contexts. Laughing at a funeral would elicit some stern frowns in this society I’m sure. Usually a lot of that doesn’t bother me but for some reason I think it would in this situation. Could it be that I’m one of those people? I think it’s time for a little introspection.

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9 Responses to "Double Dead Serious"

[…] drove faster and didn’t stop until I was far from the scene of the accident. You thought the mongoose situation was funny (and I was just beginning to get over it) but this time I’ve really messed up. I […]

Are you mad? Salma you are a hoot ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ….. you had me laughing out loudly, my poor co-workers were wondering what the hell was wrong with me. I was too embarrassed for you to even show them this post ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Thanks for the laugh. Is ure son aware that his mom is nuts? dwl lol lol lol

As for the mongoose………………….GET OVER IT! Its good that you were able to think about how you would have felt about Kubas possible actions in that sort of setting and how others may have felt and their possible reaction. Honestly though, my decision not to take him would have been based only on the possible reaction (from him) in such a setting. At the risk of sounding insensitive the actions or reactions of the other persons there would not have been a though.

Well it’s been awhile, and this “double dead serious” post was a great welcome back to catching up with your blog posts. This one made my heart race a little, made me smile a little and even gave me a little food for thought. I never actually considered Kuba in a funeral setting and how the concept of death and dying would be thought or if it even should, and then how kuba would go about grasping it and then dealing with it? Definitely something to ponder….

I’m sorry sis I don’t even know what to say, I still can’t seem to think about it without laughing so hard. I know I would be grossed out if that happened to me but (cracking up again)darn girl. I’m sure by now the mongoose community have up a MOST WANTED posted of you circulating, so watch your back!!!!! I couldn’t help that one it had to be said. Again I’m so sorry……… lol, lol, lol, lol

I will pray for you and I will be sure to keep my family members far from you!! This is too funny, a mongoose!!! Hahaha

Wow…Yah dead serious!!!! Ture the head of the family is very important……..

Girl I too have to go do something! This is too funny! But I am glad that u will be able to read this at a later date and laugh about it on such a sad occasion. My condolences all the same!
Girl this was a good one! Did u check for I’d and an address to send a condolence card to the bereaved mongoose family!

Ok go do something! Lmbo!

sorry about your grand-dad you know my family’s prayers are with you.

don’t feel bad about killing the mongoose….the first time I hit an animal which was a dog I told everyone the dog wanted to commit suicide cause why else would you run into oncoming traffic….lol they need to learn how to wait or use the pedestrian crossing when they wanna cross the roads…LOL

totally enjoyed

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